Too much is fine

When I was riding back home and listening to my iPod, I saw a familiar face or should I say look-alike face only. First, no feelings at all. Just normal passengers to act. Observing things around. Waiting for the next stops. But for a few moment I act strange because of I don't know ego or feelings struck me that time. Plus the music became the catalyst on this creepy feelings a while ago. It just so that I remember someone whom I thought for me but end up nothing or end up in different way. I know that this not her problem now. I lost her because of cowardly act before as I doubt and don't reach her arms. What should I do? I'm scared during that time. I can't fall for any other before. I was to depressed still from what just happened to me. I can't blame myself neither. I thought it's a good reason to say to you that "I'm happy to be friends only." but after a few months I realized that I needed you most. Because you were there when my body is in pain and down. You were with me chatting and cheering me up and telling me "you're nice, don't worry!" And every second during that time, I looked at the girl secretly like a stalker. I don't know why I'm seeing your face to that girl. I was so attached that for some reason I just thought that it was you. I almost pass by my destination but came to realize that I'm just reminiscing things before and should wake to the reality that my world is not your world.  I thought that I have you but I didn't take good care of you that's why you slipped away from me.

I know it's too much. Things shouldn't become worst because of me. Now I'm living desperately missing you everyday that I thought it will passed easily. I was wrong that you still stayed in my heart. But things should be moving forward. I know I should move and get back on track. Maybe someday we'll meet us again. But for now my feelings is playing the song long distance by Bruno Mars

.

Now I should say that you'll be here no matter what. As a friend or as my love it doesn't matter. The important thing is that you make my life one of the happiest when I'm down and tired.